Making REAL Southern Sweet Tea

I am a southern lady, and I like it that way.  But, sometimes when it occurs to me that not everyone else in the world is the same way, I think about how odd some of our traditions are.  Don’t get me wrong… I understand the purpose behind most of the traditions and sayings… and I think that Southern people are some of the best peeps to be around.  I love that we associate comfort with food, and that is a southern woman’s answer to almost every possible trial in life.  Your husband left you?  Let’s get together and eat a whole tub of ice cream!  Someone in your family passed away?  We will fill your house with enough fried chicken, corn casserole and peach cobbler to feed you and a small army for a month!  And not just the tough times…. Prayer meeting at church? Everyone bring food! Prayer just goes better on a full stomach.  (Southern Baptist women are by far the best cooks on the face of the earth… just sayin’)  Just had a baby?  We’ll take turns bringing food to you for weeks!  Family gathering?  Food!  And every holiday known to man is associated with some type of food to us.  There really doesn’t even have to be an “occasion”.  There has never been once that I have crossed the threshold of my Nanny’s house that she didn’t attempt to feed me… even if I had eaten right before coming there.  When people come to my house, it’s just natural for me to ask “Would you care for something to eat?  Let me get you something to drink!”  I WANT to feed anyone and everyone that comes to visit… and even some who don’t.  I take drinks outside to our lawn people when they come.  They have no clue what I am saying (and vice versa), but they are sweating and working in MY yard and that makes it my responsibility to offer them refreshment.

But, sometimes I think of the things that are a little more odd.  For instance,… I am not a “smoker”, but I have smoked in my lifetime, and I can only do so sitting down.  I don’t know why, but as a southern lady we are taught that it is “crass” (how’s that for an old-fashioned word?) to smoke while walking.  And standing is only marginally better, but acceptable if you have vacated your seat for someone older or more fragile than you.  I think of my dearly departed Meemaw… she smoked almost her whole life, but I can’t think of one instance where I saw her walk and smoke.  The only time I saw her stand to smoke was when she had visitors and they occupied the only two chairs on her porch. She would stand leaning against the railing as she delicately puffed.

A few others:  Never wear white pants/shoes between Labor Day and Memorial Day (I know it’s acceptable these days, I just can’t bring myself to do it); You can be as catty and vindictive as you want with your words, as long as you say them with a smile and a sweet southern voice; Similar to the previous one, but still distinctly different – You can criticize anyone about anything, as long as it is preceded or followed by the phrase “Bless their heart….” (example. “He really tried to make good grades, but he’s as dumb as a rock… bless his heart!  Or  “Bless her little heart… she thinks those white pants look good on her.”)

In the south, we are raised to be careful when gossiping (not that southern ladies would gossip!) because in the south we keep up with relations for several generations.  So, just because you’re talking about someone from two counties away, doesn’t mean that you aren’t about to insult the great-aunt, or third cousin twice removed of the person you are speaking to!

Of the UTMOST importance… as a southern hostess… always have REAL sweet tea on hand to offer guests.  The idea of having unsweetened tea and allowing people to add their own sweetener, or *gasp* real sugar, had to have been the work of either a Northerner, or Satan himself.  Drinking a glass of unsweetened tea with undissolved sugar crystals swirling around is nothing like drinking a tall glass of sweet refreshing tea!  I can hear the ice cubes clinking against the glass now.  Ahhh.... nectar of the gods.  And, if you don’t know the secret to making REAL southern sweet tea… I suggest that you find your best “Southern” gal-pal and fall on her mercy to beg for the secret.